Bacon Soup is quickly becoming a household name, everyone. And I have proof. We were mentioned in two different blogs recently.
Chris Marr of Anotherwaytowastetimeonline said in a Dec. 19th post titled Yes, Virginia:
"19. Bacon Soup is going to tear me a new one for this."
Clearly, this author is aware of my Blog and its purpose. And if you read that post you'll see that Marr is apparently on drugs since that post (everything except his insightful mention of Bacon Soup) is utter trash. He rambles incoherently for what appears to be hours and drops Ellen Degeneres in there for some reason. His prediciton of Bacon Soup tearing him a new one was spot on. I'm glad you braced yourself for the impact Mr. Marr. That post was abysmal.
And we're also mentioned by Laura Deaton of World's Best Burger in a Dec. 28th post titled An Observation:
"Our friend Severo, summed up the loss very eloquently on his blog."
I don't know who this Laura Deaton is but she's obviously very perceptive. And she has great taste in blogs. Blog on Ms. Deaton.
Monday, December 31, 2007
Is Jacob a deadbeat dad? Yes.
Victim: Jacob
Blog Title: Freedom for the first time
Jacob says about his infant son: And like I said, I don't entirely resent the poor kid. In fact, I spent the whole day (at least the part after I got up around noon) taking care of the kid and giving Kim a break.
Bacon Soup says: Who the hell posted this? Kevin Federline? When you refer to you first born child as "the kid" and the extent of your feelings toward that child are that you "don't entirely resent" him, maybe it's time DEFACS stepped in.
Blog Title: Freedom for the first time
Jacob says about his infant son: And like I said, I don't entirely resent the poor kid. In fact, I spent the whole day (at least the part after I got up around noon) taking care of the kid and giving Kim a break.
Bacon Soup says: Who the hell posted this? Kevin Federline? When you refer to you first born child as "the kid" and the extent of your feelings toward that child are that you "don't entirely resent" him, maybe it's time DEFACS stepped in.
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Mickey needs to get a fuckin' life
Victim: Mickey
Blog: Anybody home, McFly?
Mickey says: Really, people. You gotta give me something to read. I know there’re a few of you out there still poking around the internet, leaving the odd comment here and there, but this feels like the e-Armageddon or something. I can only amuse myself for so long. Besides that, I don’t have anything to write about. I need inspiration and, I hate to say it, you inspire me.
Bacon Soup says: Boo hoo. No one posted anything in a few days. Whatever am i going to do with my day if i can't stare vacantly at a computer monitor and read about other people's experiences? Get a fuckin' life. Go out and do stuff. Interact with something other than your keyboard......... Jesus.
Victim: Courtney
Blog: Blame the Eggnog
Courtney says: So suck it, beeyotches.
Bacon Soup says: Dear God, make her stop saying things like this.
Victim: Meaghan
Blog: Haircuts
Meaghan says: I got my bangs this time and a few layers. JJ said, "Hey, you were made for bangs!"
Bacon Soup says: WTF?
Blog: Anybody home, McFly?
Mickey says: Really, people. You gotta give me something to read. I know there’re a few of you out there still poking around the internet, leaving the odd comment here and there, but this feels like the e-Armageddon or something. I can only amuse myself for so long. Besides that, I don’t have anything to write about. I need inspiration and, I hate to say it, you inspire me.
Bacon Soup says: Boo hoo. No one posted anything in a few days. Whatever am i going to do with my day if i can't stare vacantly at a computer monitor and read about other people's experiences? Get a fuckin' life. Go out and do stuff. Interact with something other than your keyboard......... Jesus.
Victim: Courtney
Blog: Blame the Eggnog
Courtney says: So suck it, beeyotches.
Bacon Soup says: Dear God, make her stop saying things like this.
Victim: Meaghan
Blog: Haircuts
Meaghan says: I got my bangs this time and a few layers. JJ said, "Hey, you were made for bangs!"
Bacon Soup says: WTF?
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Bhutto assasinated
However many miles away, an attack on democracy anywhere in the world, affects us all. Former Pakistani prime minister, Benazir Bhutto (who in 1988 became the first female leader of a muslim country) was assasinated today during a political rally in Rawalpindi, near the nation's capital of Islamabad.
As many of you know, Bhutto had returned to Pakistan after eight years of exile. She was the front runner for her Pakistan People's Party and with overwhelming support from the people she looked to sweep the upcoming general elections, restoring democracy to Pakistan after years of dictatorship.
Bhutto's father was Prime Minister of Pakistan until he was ousted in a coup and subsequently assasinated by the new government. This prompted Bhutto do dedicate her life to bringing freedom and democracy to a Pakistan she saw in turmoil, but one she knew could one day be a free democracy. Even during her self-imposed exile in Dubai, she had been an ardent supporter of opposition forces to free Pakistan from the heavy-handed government it still labors under.
Whatever your political inclinations, consider that the world has lost a remarkable woman today. And even if you don't care about the political climate in a country you will probably never even see, please know that the world is a little poorer today. It has lost of a freedom fighter.
"Democracy is only a dream: it should be put in the same category as Arcadia, Santa Claus, and Heaven." - H. L. Mencken
Benazir Bhutto: 1953 - 2007
Thursday, December 20, 2007
A smattering of adult acne
You'd think that with all my other physical defects, that the gods of aesthetic beauty would at the very least grant me save passage through adulthood without the fear of acne.
But no.... I woke up this morning and what do i see, but two HIDEOUS pimples on the left side of my face. I have named them Liezel and Pontoof. And they are to be my companions for as long as fate deems necessary.
At the ripe old age of 22, you'd think that my acne days would have been long gone. But NOOOOOOO, not me.
Once again I reiterate my suggestion that ONLY ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE be allowed to get acne. They have so much going for them that even acne wouldn't be that much of a hindrance. For people like me, however, adult acne is just another cosmic kick in the gut.
Can i get an amen?
But no.... I woke up this morning and what do i see, but two HIDEOUS pimples on the left side of my face. I have named them Liezel and Pontoof. And they are to be my companions for as long as fate deems necessary.
At the ripe old age of 22, you'd think that my acne days would have been long gone. But NOOOOOOO, not me.
Once again I reiterate my suggestion that ONLY ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE be allowed to get acne. They have so much going for them that even acne wouldn't be that much of a hindrance. For people like me, however, adult acne is just another cosmic kick in the gut.
Can i get an amen?
Monday, December 17, 2007
Meaghan is on the warpath. And she kicks ass .... allegedly
Victim: Meaghan
Blog Title: Party or Poo?
Meaghan says: While eating, I looked around and discovered the decor of the apartment was extremely original and pretty cool and told the host this. After eating, we played a holiday game of Win, Lose or Draw - a game where I kick ass ...
Bacon Soup says: Man, Meaghan sure doesn't beat around the bush when it comes to extolling her own virtues. Even I don't say "I kick ass." I mean, i'm kind of a big deal, but to say "I kick ass" is a little much for me.
And Meaghan's blog, Party or Poo, is MUST READ. She details a party thrown by Ryan on Saturday night. And while she tries to use general pronouns and vague descriptions of people to avoid saying their real names, it's pretty clear that the host is Ryan, The Bohemian is Tricia (ryan's girlfriend), her former boss is Charlotte and the drunken fool yelling out wrong answers is Mike Colombo. Her blog is pretty much a thinly veiled "Fuck You" to many of the party-goers...... delicious!!!!!
Blog Title: Party or Poo?
Meaghan says: While eating, I looked around and discovered the decor of the apartment was extremely original and pretty cool and told the host this. After eating, we played a holiday game of Win, Lose or Draw - a game where I kick ass ...
Bacon Soup says: Man, Meaghan sure doesn't beat around the bush when it comes to extolling her own virtues. Even I don't say "I kick ass." I mean, i'm kind of a big deal, but to say "I kick ass" is a little much for me.
And Meaghan's blog, Party or Poo, is MUST READ. She details a party thrown by Ryan on Saturday night. And while she tries to use general pronouns and vague descriptions of people to avoid saying their real names, it's pretty clear that the host is Ryan, The Bohemian is Tricia (ryan's girlfriend), her former boss is Charlotte and the drunken fool yelling out wrong answers is Mike Colombo. Her blog is pretty much a thinly veiled "Fuck You" to many of the party-goers...... delicious!!!!!
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Jacob has lost it. And why does Loree force me to mock her?
Victim: Jacob
Blog title: God's Promise
Jacob says: I'm going to win the lottery tomorrow. I'm sure God told me this while I was sitting in the dark with my door closed ...
Bacon Soup says: Now i am by no means an authority on our Lord and Savior. I don't purport to know his thoughts and whereabouts. But if i was to speculate as to the activities of the Messiah, i'm sure i could come up with a few things he'd be doing rather than visiting Jacob Johnston between classes. But who am i to say that the Holy Spirit does not frequent whatever middle school at which Jacob is employed? He or She has been known to appear in unusual places. So let's assume Jacob is telling the truth that he was visited by God. Apparently instead of revealing some great universal truth or warning him of the error of his ways or condemning his sinful lifestyle or perhaps even foretelling an impending apocalypse, God chooses instead to use this unique opportunity to let Jacob know that he's going to win the lottery.
Having said that, if you DO win the lottery Jacob, please remember that I have ALWAYS been fond of you and your wife Kate and your offspring (whose name escapes me at the moment). And i have always said to people that you are nothing if not generous. In fact, your generosity is surpassed only by your love of the indigenous people of the Americas of which i am descended.
Victim: Loree
Blog Title: A Museum After my own Heart
Loree says: ...but few of you know that my fascination about the J.F.K. assassination was once so strong that when I was 10 years old, my school sent me to the regional 4-H speech competition with a speech—a very compelling speech— I had written outlining the various conspiracy theories surrounding J.F.K.’s death.
Bacon Soup says: you know Loree, I really don't want to use this stuff against you. but you just HAND it to me. 10 years old and you're at a regional 4-H speech competition in which you outine the various JFK conspiracy theories. Frankly, i don't know what to say. I just give up.
Blog title: God's Promise
Jacob says: I'm going to win the lottery tomorrow. I'm sure God told me this while I was sitting in the dark with my door closed ...
Bacon Soup says: Now i am by no means an authority on our Lord and Savior. I don't purport to know his thoughts and whereabouts. But if i was to speculate as to the activities of the Messiah, i'm sure i could come up with a few things he'd be doing rather than visiting Jacob Johnston between classes. But who am i to say that the Holy Spirit does not frequent whatever middle school at which Jacob is employed? He or She has been known to appear in unusual places. So let's assume Jacob is telling the truth that he was visited by God. Apparently instead of revealing some great universal truth or warning him of the error of his ways or condemning his sinful lifestyle or perhaps even foretelling an impending apocalypse, God chooses instead to use this unique opportunity to let Jacob know that he's going to win the lottery.
Having said that, if you DO win the lottery Jacob, please remember that I have ALWAYS been fond of you and your wife Kate and your offspring (whose name escapes me at the moment). And i have always said to people that you are nothing if not generous. In fact, your generosity is surpassed only by your love of the indigenous people of the Americas of which i am descended.
Victim: Loree
Blog Title: A Museum After my own Heart
Loree says: ...but few of you know that my fascination about the J.F.K. assassination was once so strong that when I was 10 years old, my school sent me to the regional 4-H speech competition with a speech—a very compelling speech— I had written outlining the various conspiracy theories surrounding J.F.K.’s death.
Bacon Soup says: you know Loree, I really don't want to use this stuff against you. but you just HAND it to me. 10 years old and you're at a regional 4-H speech competition in which you outine the various JFK conspiracy theories. Frankly, i don't know what to say. I just give up.
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